Top Albums 2010 - Reject Edition

The close-but-no-cigar-list.

1. Bionic – Christina Aguilera
Despite promising contributions Christina Aguilera falls short of delivering a truly interesting album (in the context of Christina Aguilera albums). At its best ‘Bionic’ shows that there is still room out there for someone with her talent in today’s pop scene. At its worst it sounds like Ke$ha – the musical equivalent of crotchless panties and empty liquor bottles – only without the satire. Or even worse: like Christina Aguilera some five years ago. There is no amount of explicit sexual content or girl-on-girl action that can cover that up.

2. Have One On Me – Joanna Newsom
I guess I just didn’t get Joanna Newsom. It’s not her, it’s me. Although, in a way, it is her. Don’t get me wrong, I like her music. She is one of the most gifted composers of the moment and on top of that she’s a skilled instrumentalist. I just can’t take her intricate, morbidly overcharged melodies and vocal acrobatics for two hours on end. ‘Have One On Me’ is a masterpiece for those who love her, at the same time it borders on absolute terror for those who don’t.

3. The 2010 hypes
I know I shouldn’t, but I can’t help comparing. And in the case of BBC favorites Ellie Goulding and Marina & the Diamonds I just couldn't help but wonder if they’d match up to 2009 revelation La Roux. As it turned out they couldn’t quite do so. Goulding got the benefit of the doubt for 2010: her 2009 releases sounded promising, but simultaneously gave away a certain legerity. Her somewhat colorless, disappointing debut ‘Lights’ confirmed the latter. Marina Diamandis gets a long way riding on her operatic roller-coaster voice and theatrical personality, but never really amazes with her fluorescent opera-pop debut ‘The Family Jewels’. Then again, it’s not her fault she was constantly compared to Florence + the Machine – for the life of me, I wouldn’t know why you would compare them. Maybe it’s the name. Either way, both miss a certain depth to their music. And in that respect, I will continue to be on the lookout for the next La Roux.


4. Flesh Tone - Kelis
French dance producer and one of the worst things to have happened to music in recent history David Guetta revamped Kelis' dying career in 2010, proving the old adage that even a broken clock is right twice a day. 'Acappella' is without a doubt one of the best club track of 2010, but as a whole 'Flesh Tone' is just a little bit one-dimensional. A shame, because Kelis has the voice and stage presence to be so much more. She's back, but deserves better.


5. /\/\/\Y/\ – M.I.A.
This is hands down my favorite album in this list. The main issue is that M.I.A. raised the bar quite significantly with her 2007 effort 'Kala', an exciting, genre-defying near-masterpiece. On '/\/\/\Y/\' she sounds louder than ever - and even less nuanced - but at the same time less versatile. Granted, she's still better than most everyone else, but I've seen what she's done with Sleigh Bells.